Behold the summer bouquets, Volume 1

The earth laughs in flowers.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson, American poet, essayist, and lecturer

For the first time in three years, we had a dry spring. The previous two seasons, which were subjected to rainy springs, my garden underperformed in terms of production and size of blooms. Whereas I used to get three bouquets from one clipping session in the side yard, I was lucky to get one bouquet a week – and those bouquets were anemic looking.

A bountiful summer - three bouquets from one clipping.

A bountiful summer this year – three bouquets from one clipping of the side yard.

This year, my chocolate cosmos is as tall as I’ve ever seen (I’ve always had trouble getting the plant to last more than a season, so this healthy production is a bonus). My beloved dahlias are towering and full of multiple, strong buds. The dinner plate-size dahlias are living up to their potential. Upon learning that Costco had palettes of big dahlias, I snapped up four plants and tore out a patch of poppies and bachelors buttons to make room in my crowded side-yard garden for more dahlias.

Mother's Day bouquet for my mother-in-law: Calla lilies and watsonias. My gardening neighbor separated her watsonia bulbs and gave them to us.

Mother’s Day bouquet for my mother-in-law Ann: Calla lilies, Peruvian lilies, love in a mist, hydrangea, and watsonias. My neighbor who loves to garden separated her watsonia bulbs and gave them to us. (In the background, my favorite painting in our house, Lamp Lady, by Gary Stutler, www.garystutler.com).

For the past four years, I have donated weekly summer bouquets for our kids’ school auctions. This is the first year I have donated for my son’s middle school. It’s a great and easy fundraiser, which brings money to the schools and only costs me the time to put the bouquets together and deliver them to the winners’ porches. I enjoy sharing my garden’s bounty with family and friends – and auction winners. I enjoy creating the bouquets and delivering them. I delight in the joy that these flowers – the earth’s laughter – bring when I give them to people who truly appreciate Nature. I experience Zen moments when I survey the garden, prune and deadhead plants, clip new blooms, and especially create the bouquets. I’ve celebrated Mother’s Day, birthdays, and anniversaries with my flowers. I’ve brought flowers for friends who are grieving losses. When we have guests, I arrange a small bouquet on the dresser by the guest bed in our fourth bedroom. I’ve thanked neighbors who have taken care of our dog Rex with flowers. And I’ve given flowers for no occasion at all.

A June bouquet for our middle school auction bid winner.

A June bouquet for our middle school auction bid winner.

I learned how to make a bouquet from David, who inherited his home’s garden from the previous owner, Joe, who had a green thumb. The yellow dahlias, which are late summer bloomers, have been in the yard for decades, and faithfully come back summer after summer. David likes more greenery in his bouquets, whereas I have a penchant for “stuffing” the vases full of dahlias and more dahlias. Through the years, I have branched out and planted different kinds of flowers that are long-stemmed and ideal for bouquets. My go-to nurseries are Annie’s Annuals (740 Market Avenue, Richmond, CA 94801, 510.215.1671) and East Bay Nursery (2332 San Pablo Avenue, Berkeley, CA 94702), though I’ve snagged dahlias from Trader Joe’s, and, as I’ve mentioned earlier, Costco.

A late June bouquet for our middle school auction bid winner. The deer kept away from the front-yard gladiolas this year!

A late June bouquet for our middle school auction bid winner. The deer kept away from the front-yard gladiolus this year!

To pay homage to my garden, I’m sharing my bouquets from this summer on my blog. Enjoy! If you have a garden, share it with your family, friends, and neighbors. If you receive a bouquet, give a hug to the gardener. Spread beauty and joy!

Embroidered flowers  and navy eyelet are fashion's summer bouquet.

Embroidered flowers and navy eyelet are fashion’s summer bouquet.

Lava 9 (Berkeley, CA) chunky ring and hoop earrings, and reclaimed vintage necklace by M.E. Moore (Gorgeous and Green, Berkeley, CA).

Lava 9 (Berkeley, CA) chunky ring and hoop earrings, and reclaimed vintage necklace by M.E. Moore (Gorgeous and Green, Berkeley, CA).

Antique purse from Bellingham, WA.

Textures in green and blue, complemented by golden accessories. More texture from an antique purse from Bellingham, WA.

Plant a tree, have a child, write a book

(Every man should) plant a tree, have a child, and write a book. These all live on after us, insuring a measure of immortality.
– attributed to the Talmud and Jose Martí, Cuban revolutionary and poet

Vintage Underground's owner Carlos showing off his creations.

Vintage Underground’s owner Carlos showing off his creations.

On my last day of vacation in Chicago a few weeks ago, while on my vintage hunt, I met Carlos, the owner of Vintage Underground (1507 N Milwaukee Avenue, 773.384.7880), a shop that carries clothing, accessories, and jewelry dating from the mid-century. He was receptive to me taking pictures of his store for my blog, and when I finished making my way around the huge basement-level shop, he asked me what my blog was about. I told him it was my way of celebrating entering my 50s by living creatively, fully, and meaningfully. When I mentioned having finished my first novel back in 2006, only to be crushed by receiving 60 rejections from literary agents, Carlos scoffed.

Our ginkgo tree, which we planted in our backyard after we got married nearly 15 years ago.

Our ginkgo tree, one of my favorite kind of trees, which we planted in our backyard after David and I got married nearly 15 years ago.

“Sixty?” he repeated. “That’s nothing!” He proceeded to tell me that he would have stopped at 100, if that. “‘Plant a tree, write a book,'” he said. “Ever hear of that?” When I shook my head, he advised me to look up the Buddhist saying on the Internet. [When I came home, I indeed looked it up and found that there is disagreement about its provenance, but most references seem to give the nod to either the Talmud or Cuban revolutionary and poet Jose Martí. The order of the commandments is also varied. Carlos, as you can see, left out the part about having a child and the reason for doing these things.] For Carlos, the purpose of planting a tree and writing a book was not just about immortality but also expressing yourself, taking delight in these activities, and simply being.

Me and my kids, my heart and soul, downtown, along the Chicago River.

My kids – my heart and soul – and me downtown, along the Chicago River.

He showed me a turn-of-the-century handbag that sported two compartments. He had attached watch parts and gears to one side of the handbag. On the inside, he had inserted various things – a lipstick case and a toy gun – in the elastic straps. He also showed me a necklace and cuff he had made especially for a party he was attending. The watch hanging from a thick chain sprouted wings, while watch parts embellished the wide polished sterling silver cuff. All three pieces evoke a Steampunk aesthetic.

When Carlos told me making jewelry was his form of therapy, I laughed. But he was serious. Why pay someone money to listen to you talk about what’s troubling you and then you leave and that’s that? Here in his shop, he can create something beautiful and feel good about it. The act of creation is joyful, soulful, and meaningful. Other people also appreciate and purchase his creations, and he takes pride knowing they are wearing what he has designed. What he creates lives on. Carlos was on to something. And I fully agree with his philosophy on creation.

Leather and lace for summer.

Enjoy life! With cut-out leather and lace for summer (handbag from The Fickle Bag, Berkeley, CA).

Dress comfortably in the summertime, and dress with confidence.

Dress comfortably in the summertime, but more importantly, dress with confidence.

When I came home and found the full reference to the quote, at various times during that day and following days I pondered how it applied to me. Taken literally, I have done all three – we have planted fruitless cherry, ginkgo, and peach trees in our backyard and twin Aristocrat pear trees in our front yard; I have two children; and I’ve written my first novel, though it still needs one more round before I am ready to say that it’s done. But I realize having done all three is not the end of the journey. Our deciduous trees need their leaves to be raked and composted every fall. Their branches need to be pruned. They need watering. Our children, especially as they head into adolescence, will need just as much guidance, albeit with an invisible hand and eye, as when they were toddlers. And writing a book is a life-long process – one in which you get better as you get older and draw from your life experiences and wisdom. And then the next book is an extension, a growth of the first one, a growth of you. I am a better writer with each piece I write, whether fiction or nonfiction; I am a better writer than certainly seven years ago and even two years ago.

Reliving the nostalgic 70s with bell-bottom lace pants and floppy hat.

Be creative in all you do: Reviving the nostalgic 70s with bell-bottom lace pants and floppy hat.

For me, the original saying could not have come at a better time, when I’m going to be spending the next month and a half doing one last revision on my first novel and then figuring out how to set it free out in the world. There can be variations on the theme – plant vegetables or flowers, help birth babies or baby animals, adopt or mentor a child, write and record a song or design a building or paint a painting or choreograph a dance. Plant a tree, have a baby, write a book – such poetic, yet fierce words. Find your variation on a theme. Rejoice in the act. Become “immortal.” Simply be. Fully alive.

Novel almost done.

Novel almost done!

Chicago: Vintage love in Wicker Park

Hipsters: A subculture of men and women typically in their 20’s and 30’s that value independent thinking, counter-culture, progressive politics, an appreciation of art and indie-rock, creativity, intelligence, and witty banter. The greatest concentrations of hipsters can be found living in the Williamsburg, Wicker Park, and Mission District neighborhoods of major cosmopolitan centers such as New York, Chicago, and San Francisco, respectively.
– The Urban Dictionary

The Vintage Underground beckons patrons to "Come down...it's fun!"

The Vintage Underground beckons patrons to “Come down…it’s fun!”

Our vacation to Chicago would not have been complete, in my estimation, without the thrill of a vintage hunt. I didn’t have time before our trip to conduct research, so I did a quick Internet search of antique and vintage shops while in town, trying to narrow it down to walkable places within the Loop. If I had my way, I would have set aside an entire day, ideally two days, to hop from one vintage shop to another. As is, I only had a precious three hours on our last day in Chicago. My strategy: Curate and find two shops near one another that had stellar reviews. Given my time constraint, I figured I would spend quality time in a couple of places.

Not knowing which neighborhood was my destination, I struck out for W. North Avenue. It took some effort to find the Blue line train, but once I did, I was on my way to the thrill of the hunt. It turns out I was in Wicker Park, a neighborhood described as hipster not only by the Urban Dictionary but by Forbes and Nextdoor.com, which ranked Wicker Park fourth in its Top 10 “Hippest Hipster Neighborhood” in the U.S. And it turns out, as a hipster place, Wicker Park was at the epicenter of vintage shops.

Strands of pearls at Vintage Underground.

Strands of pearls at Vintage Underground.

My first stop was Vintage Underground (1834 W. North Avenue, 773.252.4559), an unassuming basement establishment. When I reached the last step, I was greeted by a friendly young sales assistant who, upon letting her know of my vintage love and blog, happily let me take pictures of the 3,500-foot shop, which housed a dizzying number of mirrored display cases dripping with vintage costume jewelry, ranging from mid-century on up. This was not a vintage basement, it was vintage heaven, like Twentieth Century in Boston.

Display cases are brimming with mid to late 20th century costume jewelry.
Brimming with mid to late 20th century costume jewelry, display cases are organized by color or type of jewelry.

But Vintage Underground had jewelry whose price tags range from very affordable to I’ll just admire longingly from afar. The shop has more than just jewelry. It carries purses, shoes, clothes, and other accessories, but I don’t look at clothes when I’m in a time crunch or when there is so much inventory that I am overwhelmed, as was my case today. I can quickly scan display cases and see what catches my eye. Despite the amount of jewelry on display, they are grouped by type of jewelry – rhinestone, pearls, colored rhinestones, and so on – which enables efficient scanning. I completed my once-over and then honed in for the kill.

Unusual vintage purses are also on display.

Unusual vintage purses are also on display.

I wish I had asked the sales assistant for her name, so I could do a shout out on her behalf by name. She was incredibly helpful and cheerful. I had spied a tall display case with unusual jewelry. It belonged to the owner, Carlos, who fuses steampunk-style parts such as watch gears to vintage or antique jewelry and accessories to create original pieces. The sales assistant showed me gleaming wide silver cuffs with watch parts and a necklace with a silver bullet. Carlos appeared, and I had a great conversation with him – so great that it will be a blog topic on Wednesday! One of the things I love to do in vintage shops is get a feel for the shop and a sense of the owner and/or the people who work there.

Rhinestones, anyone?

Icy rhinestones, anyone?

Carlos and the sales assistant recommended that I check out their sister store, Vintage Underground Boutique (1507 N. Milwaukee Avenue, 773.384.7880), a curated vintage shop styled as a boutique just a few blocks away. The sales assistant was kind enough to escort me there. I loved the boutique concept and enjoyed looking at their jewelry, though I didn’t have time to check out the great selection of dresses. It was back to the Underground, where I settled on two unsigned pieces – an etched sterling silver tiny purse on a long sterling silver chain and an ornate chocker locket. I’m told that both are Victorian, but I’d love verification. I have not been able to find similar pieces online, so if anyone can shed light on these pieces, I’d appreciate help learning more about them. My neighbor, an eBay veteran, thought the chocker was a mourning locket. Regardless of their age, among the many wonderful pieces at Vintage Underground, those two were the ones I kept coming back to, which meant they were coming home with me.

Victorian chocker with locket.

Victorian chocker with locket.

Sterling silver miniature etched purse on a long sterling silver chain.

Sterling silver miniature etched purse on a long sterling silver chain.

While walking back to the Blue Line train station, I retraced my steps to N. Milwaukee Avenue and found Store B Vintage (1472 N. Milwaukee Avenue, 773.772.4296) and Eskell (1509 N. Milwaukee Avenue, 773.486.0830), which were on my original list. I didn’t find anything at Store B Vintage. Eskell was also on my list. This boutique carries contemporary brands and its own line, which is vintage inspired. Happily, I managed to find a couple of pieces of jewelry here by local jewelry designer Laura Lombardi, who was profiled by Refinery29 back in April.

It was time to head back, though I am sure there are probably other vintage or unique shops on this busy street that I didn’t see. As I waited on the platform for my train back, I saw a street faire going on below. Oh to have one more day in Chicago! Under three hours – including subway and walking time – is not adequate time to explore vintage shops in any city – let alone Chicago – but I think I made a pretty good go of it.

Laura Lombardi's necklaces are made from reclaimed vintage brass findings.

Laura Lombardi’s necklaces are made from reclaimed vintage brass findings. The necklace on the right is a vintage locket hung on a six-inch single strand and then attached to the loop that goes around the neck. Both necklaces from Eskell.

The Purple Pig
We finally made it to the Purple Pig, which is downtown, on the Magnificent Mile (500 N. Michigan Avenue, 312.464.1744). Our strategy was to get there right at five, when dinner is served, and we had no problem getting seated at a communal table this time around. The Purple Pig – whose tag line is “cheese, swine & wine” – was voted one of the 10 best new restaurants in America by Bon Appétit Magazine in 2010. We know why! The kids told us they weren’t hungry at all when we were seated, but once we looked at the menu and our waiter answered our questions, suddenly the kids were hungry – and they had no trouble eating.

The Purple Pig is starting to fill up and the servers are whizzing by.

The Purple Pig is starting to fill up with customers and the servers are whizzing by.

We started off with antipasti – Broccoli with Roasted Garlic & Anchovy Vinaigrette and Shaved Brussels Sprouts, Pecorino Noce & Parmigiano Reggiano. Then on to the a la Plancha: Isabella downed her Razor Clams with Oregano, Lemon & Olive Oil, Jacob and I ordered Scallop Spiedini with Chickpea Aioli, and David had the Prosciutto Crusted Cobia with Manila Clams & Sea Beans. David and I shared a bottle of Pasion De Bobal 2010, a Spanish varietal of the Valencia grape. We had to order a plate of cheeses, since it was one of their specialties, and while we were stuffed, we couldn’t pass up the dolci – Grandma D’s Chocolate Cake with Almond & Orange Marmellata and Bread Pudding with Marsala & Citrus. We were very content when we waddled out and we were happy we made it to the Purple Pig. We didn’t have another opportunity to try Fontina Grill, so we’ll have to try the next time we’re in Chicago. It was a great trip, but I have to add – which has become my mantra – I wish I had another day or two.

The Purple Pig is tucked away from N. Michigan Avenue.

The Purple Pig is tucked away off N. Michigan Avenue.

Celebrating Father’s Day

I’d seen my father. He was a poor man, and I watched him do astonishing things.
– Sidney Poitier, American actor

After losing two games in a baseball tournament in Martinez on Saturday, my son, Jacob, and his Hornets team came back to win the two Sunday games. Happy Father’s Day to his dad and manager. It was a nice gift to give and receive.

My father, who was born in 1907 and passed away in 1995, would have been 106 this yea. I celebrate his courage that brought him to this country in the 1920s and gave him numerous adventures from Seattle to New York to Los Angeles.

I celebrate my father-in-law, Jerry, who gave his children a firm foundation and a sense of responsibility in life and to their children.

I celebrate my husband, David, who is a wonderful, loving dad to our two children and who believes in me and encourages me as a writer. There is no better gift that I continuously receive.

Happy Father’s Day to all the dads in the world.

June is for wearing summer dresses.

June is for wearing summer dresses.

Vintage earrings and necklaces and Lava 9 ring (Berkeley, CA) play up the colors of the crocheted dress.

Vintage earrings and necklaces and Lava 9 ring (Berkeley, CA) play up the colors of the crocheted dress.

Vintage jewelry and summer dress close-up.

Vintage jewelry and summer dress close-up.

Book spine haiku, Volume 4

Describe plum-blossoms?
Better than my verses…white
Wordless Butterflies
– Hogan Reikan, Zen Buddhist monk

For your Friday, I give you book spine haikus. Today I offer haikus from my friend and blogger of Laurel’s Compass, Laurel Kallenbach, and two from me. Enjoy!

Laurel's first offering.

Laurel’s first offering.

Laurel's second offering.

Laurel’s second offering.

My first offering.

My first offering.

My second offering.

My second offering.

A retro look, reminiscent of 1970s Stevie Nix.

A retro look, reminiscent of 1970s Stevie Nix.

Rich chocolate velvet, golden sequins, and ethereal bow-tie peplum blouse, with Carmela Rose reclaimed chandelier earrings, Lava 9 statement ring (Berkeley, CA), and J. Crew bracelet.

Rich chocolate velvet, golden sequins, and ethereal bow-tie peplum blouse, with Carmela Rose reclaimed chandelier earrings, Lava 9 statement ring (Berkeley, CA), Sundance stacked rings, and J. Crew bracelet.

Love the textures: Beads and sequins, embroidered ombre flowers, and plush dark chocolate velvet.

Love the textures: Beads and sequins, embroidered ombre flowers, and plush dark chocolate velvet.

June 12, 1898: Philippine Independence Day declared

The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.
 – John Philpot Curran, Irish lawyer and politician

An outfit that reminds me a little of traditional Filipina fashion - the embroidered flowered blouse with stiff sleeves and scalloped edges.

An outfit reminiscent of traditional Filipina fashion – the embroidered flowered blouse with stiff sleeves.

Today is Independence Day in the Philippines. On this day in 1898, Filipino revolutionary Emilio Aguinaldo declared independence from 300 years of Spanish rule during the Spanish-American War. The Americans came to the islands to expel the Spaniards, but turned around to become the Filipinos’ next colonial ruler and exporter of the island country’s rich natural resources. Despite the declaration of independence, Filipino rebels fought for their country in 1899, in what was to become the Philippine-American War, with which few Americans are familiar. In the Treaty of Paris, Spain ceded the Philippines to the U.S. for $20 million. It was not until after World War II that the Philippines finally gained their independence.

Floral accessories for an embroidered blouse with scalloped edges.

Floral accessories for an embroidered blouse with scalloped edges.

I first read about the little-known Philippine-American War when I was researching the history of the Philippines for my first novel-in-progress, A Village in the Fields. My main character, Filipino farm worker Fausto Empleo, left his homeland to come to America to “change his luck,” which is what my father wanted to do when he left his coastal hometown of San Esteban, Ilocos Sur, in the early 1920s. The turn of the century in the Philippines was and still is an incredibly fascinating time. The exhilaration of freedom was soon stamped out by shock and betrayal. This was a war that was not acknowledged, an unofficial war. It was a war that helped determine the 1900 presidential election of incumbent William McKinley and anti-imperialist William Jennings Bryan. It has been later called the first Vietnam War for the torture that American soldiers inflicted on innocent civilians. It is a war that I will be returning to in my fiction writing.

Colors of the Pacific Ocean.

Colors of the Pacific Ocean.

In honor of Philippine Independence Day, here is an excerpt from Chapter 2, “What was left behind,” of A Village in the Fields:

When Fausto reached the second floor, he saw a candle glowing in his lelang‘s bedroom. She was usually asleep by this time. He hesitated before pulling the crocheted curtain aside, but she was sitting up, waiting for him. He sat on her bed, inhaling the musty, bitter scent of betel nut mixed with lime from her lips and red-stained teeth.

“Lelang Purificacion,” he said, “Pa will not give me his blessing.”

“If he did not love you, he would let you go without a care. You should be honored by the burden of his love,” she said, and sighing, stared out her window, the capiz-shell shutters wide open. “When you are in America, you must remember him and forgive him. Better to be hurt by his love than to be all alone with nothing.”

“What about you, Lelang? Will you try to change my mind?”

She pursed her lips as if she had swallowed something more bitter than betel nut juice. Tiny wrinkles fanned out from her mouth. “I have a story to tell you. It is not my intent to change your mind. I tell you this now because I do not want you to be ignorant.”

He laughed. “Lelang, I am going to America to gain knowledge.”

She kneaded her fingers. Veins, like thick twine wrapped around her fist, warped the shape of her hands. “Do you know the date June twelfth, eighteen ninety-eight?”

“Independence Day,” Fausto answered. “The Americans helped us defeat the Spaniards. Miss Arnold taught me about the Americans’ involvement.”

She pulled her shawl over her shoulders. “There was another war after the Spaniards were removed, but you will not find it in any American history books. Your father was too young to know what was happening in the lower provinces and on the other islands – we do not talk of the bad times – but I told him years later, when he could understand. He never forgot, but now you will make him think of it all the time.”

“Remember what?” Fausto’s voice was as taut as the woven mat stretched across his lelang‘s bed.

“The war with the Americans,” she said softly. “I had received word that my parents and sisters and brothers were being sent to a detention camp set up by American troops in our hometown of Batangas. We thought the news was false, but your lelong, Cirilo, went down there to bring them here. When he left, your father was only ten years old. More than a year and a half passed before your lelong came back alone. He had lost so much weight. He would not say what became of my family. The day he came back was the day my family ceased to exist. It was also the day your lelong ceased to exist.”

Fausto’s Lelong Cirilo, who before his long absence had welcomed the removal of the Spanish government from the Philippines, kept his sons from attending the American schools that were cropping up across the islands and swore under his breath at the American soldiers who passed through town. Two American Negroes arrived one day and settled in San Esteban. He befriended them, welcoming them into his home for meals and accepting their dinner invitations. When he returned late one evening, he confided to Purificacion that they were American soldiers who had deserted the army. “They will never return to the States. They said they are freer in our country than in their own,” he insisted, though she didn’t believe him. He told her the white American soldiers had called him “nigger” and “savage,” words that they also hurled at the Negroes. “My friends call me brother, and there is great truth to that,” he said.

Fausto had no recollection of visits to their house by Negro soldiers, though he remembered seeing two Negro men at his lelong‘s funeral. When his lelang died, he looked older than his sixty years. He always had snowy white hair as far as Fausto could recall. Each year had separated him farther from Batangas, but keeping a secret from his family for so many years had aged him, kept the memories fresh.

When Fausto’s lelong was dying, he took his wife’s hand and said, “Forgive me, Purificacion, for burdening you with silence and now the truth about your family.”

He spoke as if he’d just arrived amid the makeshift detention camps in Batangas. He was labeled an insurrecto, an insurgent, by American soldiers who found him outside the hastily drawn boundaries. Everywhere soldiers confiscated possessions and destroyed crops, torched houses and rice-filled granaries. Black clouds blotted out the sun, and rolling green fields turned to gray as ash rained down on the camp. Ash clung to their hair and eyelashes, their bare arms and legs. Cirilo tasted smoke in the rotten mangos they were being fed. Exhausted and starving, he fell asleep to the squeal of pigs that were being slaughtered nightly and left to rot in their pens. When Cirilo asked what they had done wrong, an American commander accused the villagers of being guerrilla supporters. It was necessary, the commander said, to “depopulate” the islands.

Unrest plagued the camps. Men, propelled by the hope of either being released or spared death, turned on each other by identifying alleged rebels – regardless of whether the accused were guilty or innocent. Those singled out were held down on the ground, arms pinned behind their heads or tied behind their backs, mouths pried open, beneath the running faucet of a large water tank. “Water cure,” Cirilo called it. The American soldiers in their cowboy hats shoved the butts of their rifles or their boots into the prisoners’ bloated stomachs for several minutes while a native interpreter repeated the word over and over again, “kumpisal” in Tagalog to the prisoner and “confess” in English for the Americans’ sake. But many of the prisoners drowned.

The detention camps were overcrowded, with little food or clothing to go around. Malaria, beriberi, and dengue fever raged. American doctors treated the soldiers who fell ill, but neglected the sick prisoners. Everyone in Purificacion’s family died of disease. Cirilo didn’t know if anger or grief had kept him alive. He escaped with two prisoners one night, but not without having to grab the patrolman’s bayonet and smashing his skull. On his journey back to Ilocos Sur, he heard similar stories of detention camps and ruined villages. Some said the Americans were angry because the natives were ungrateful for their help in liberating them from Spain. Instead of welcoming them as heroes, the Americans complained, the natives were betraying them, hurling their bolos and hacking to pieces American soldiers who stepped beyond the towns they had pacified. They used spears, darts, and stones, but they were sticks compared to the American bayonets. The guerrillas were easily flushed out by the American soldiers like quails in a shoot.

Cirilo met a compatriot who had fled his hometown of Balangiga on the island of Samar. He told Cirilo that the American soldiers had rounded up the townspeople and crowded them so tightly into open pens that they could not move. They slept upright, leaning against one another. The American Navy fired on his village from their gunboats before they landed to invade. “They are turning our lovely islands into a howling wilderness. They cry out, ‘Kill and burn’ everyone and everything in their path,” he said. Another man who had escaped ruin in his hometown recited an order – like a drinking song, a motto – that he said had been handed down from an American general to all his soldiers in the field: “Everything over ten” would not be spared. Everything over ten.

“This is your America,” Fausto’s lelang told him, and slumped against the scarred wooden headboard of her bed.

“Things have changed.” Fausto’s voice faltered. “When I was in school—”

“Poor boy!” She sat up, spittle flecked on her lips. “Those kind American women in those American schools were not teachers. They were just another soldier, telling you what to do. How could I tell you then? Miss Arnold opened up the world for you. Education is good. But they came here for a darker purpose.”

“Lelang, Miss Arnold is not evil.”

“You are not listening!” She shook her head, her gray hair brushing her shoulders like a stiff mantilla. “You will never be accepted by the Americans because they will always treat us different. The Negroes in America have been there for hundreds of years, but they are still treated like criminals. Why go there with this knowledge?” The flame hissed as the melted wax pooled around the short wick. Her dark eyes were wet in the candlelight. “You think your father is ignorant, but he is not. American education made you smarter, but their schools erased our past, just as the Spaniards did.”

“Lelang, I am not ignorant.” Fausto got up from her bed, but suddenly felt weightless, unanchored. He held on to one of the thick, carved bedposts.

“I told this story only once before, to your father after your lelong passed away.” Her fingers kneaded her pliant cheek, skin shattered by deep wrinkles. She whispered, “Until that time, Emiliano never knew why his own father was so untouchable.”

“I am sorry for your loss.” Fausto’s words, his whole body was stiff. He pulled down the mosquito net from the four posters of her bed until she was encased in white gauze. She seemed so far away from him as she blew out the candle.

“We must make use of the bad times,” she called out.

He unhooked the curtain from her bedroom entryway and let it fall in front of him. “It will make me stronger, Lelang,” he said. He waited to hear her voice again. In the moonlight, wisps of smoke rose and disappeared.